My Shout: Struggle Street on the market?

WE’RE thinking about a Seachange.

Earlier in the year as mentioned in this space, we considered putting Struggle Street on the market. It was a big decision. We even had a real estate type look over the place. He turned up dressed like he was about to head into a nuclear disaster, saying he’d heard bad things about Struggle Street. Bravely he did an inspection then suggested we turn to the power of prayer.

“A good flood to wash this dump away would be your best bet,’’ he explained.

“It’s the only way you’ll get any money, providing of course it’s insured. So start praying for some heavy rain.’’

We carefully explained that Struggle Street is well away from a flood zone.

“So pray a bit harder,’’ he replied.

And that was that. Struggle Street remained in our possession. It was off the market before it was ever on. The strange ways of the real estate world, we pondered. And never trust a real estate agent. Flood indeed.

But that was then. Time and circumstances can change quickly, even on Struggle Street.

We’ve been considering a move to a more coastal location ever since we couldn’t think of anything else to write in today’s column.

But where to go? Given no other news media would be likely to employ an aged sports writer/occasional columnist, we suppose we’re going to have to continue working here. So obviously a move to some exotic location is out of the question unless the office Lotto syndicate finally comes good.

We can’t imagine living at Old Bar. With the speed the place is eroding, Old Bar will be moving to Struggle Street soon enough, so why go out there?

We’re too young to go to Harrington and Crowdy Head doesn’t have a hotel, so rule them out. Black Head has a hotel and a bowling club. But they can’t even work out how to spell the name of the place - Blackhead or Black Head. Or is it Hallidays Point? So put a line through Blackhead, Black Head and Hallidays Point. A bit too close to Nabiac and its ilk for our liking as well, for reasons we shan’t go into here.

So that leaves Forster-Tuncurry. The Great Lakes. Far enough away to say we’ve left the hovel that is Struggle Street but close enough to drive to this journal.

We know Forster-Tuncurry has many natural attractions - the Lakes and Oceans, Bellevue, Sporties club and the Harry Elliott Oval. Come to think about it, we had our first beer in a pub, in the beer garden at Forster’s Lakes and Ocean Hotel, sometime back in mid to late 1970s, so we have history.

And there’s no shortage of Taree Seachangers now living out Forster-Tuncurry way. So we’d have no trouble fitting in. This is win-win.

We can easily envisage spending weekends in winter watching the Forster-Tuncurry Hawks run around, or limp around, as was the case last season. The roads out there also appear to be remarkably pot hole free, another plus.

Summers would be idyllic out Forster way, we’d imagine. Okay, the Christmas holidays might get a bit hectic what with the hordes of bloody tourists (we’re already starting to dislike them), but given we spend most of January in the editor’s office while Editor Bell is luxuriating up north somewhere, we probably wouldn’t notice.

Yes, a new start. We’re looking forward to it already. Anyone know the name of a good real estate agent? Or how to start a flood?

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